Set in a way
by PurpliePanda
Summary: This a look into the rival love between Anders and Hwake. She tells him her fear and him the same. Their idea clash but they won't let go.  F Hawke   P.s made this at 5 in the morning.


How can you save someone so set in there ways?

It is simple you can't.

You can push them and push them but in the end they are just going to push back.

And than you will lose them before you know it.

Carver had always pushed his sister the wrong way.

Trying to prove he was better, strong, faster, smarter anything to show he was one top.

In the end it didn't even matter, all his work, his words, his feelings.

Crushed gone from the word because forever ago a group of mages decide to be god.

Then the taint came, taking over the lands. I felt all mages should be made into Grey Wardens.

To pushed back the evil their people brought into the world.

But I know I could never live by that law, like all the others.

My sister was a mage, in the tower of magi, where she belongs.

But I would have kept her out if I could have, Merrill is a blood mage and I keep her safe still.

I try to say it is because she is Dalish and she will be returning to her people.

But if that was true than why had I not sent Anders, my lover of 3 years to the Gallows.

Its simple, I was fine with rules till they were thrown in my face.

All this came up when Meredith asked me to look into some run away mages.

Anders had just stepped up and disrespected Meredith and myself.

Talking about 'if mages were innocent.' Mages were guilty of breaking everything they touched.

Father killed our family when he tried to save that mage girl in the village.

That was when people started to call me Hawke.

I had just stepped up and did everything I could for our family.

I started woodworking, I sew, I did baked goods, whatever I could do to get food on the table.

Then the blight came, another gift from the mages.

And now the one man I love, magic has taken as well.

When we were just us, no mages, no end of the world moment, when he would smile and spin me around flirt and tease me.

That was the man I loved not the mage, the man.

If he had only kept his mouth shut I wouldn't storming down to his goddamn clinic.

At the very bottom of the city at that.

When I finally got there I pushed the doors open he smiled at me moving over to me.

"Hawke I cant go out today, I have a sick little girl who needs me." He pushed I strand of my hair behind me ear; so loving it made me sick.

"I need to talk to you."

My tone was dark, I knew that it was meant to be.

He put his hand on my lower back moving me to the back of the room to a area that had some of his personal things at.

"I know, your upset about what I said to Meredith."

He looked down he almost like he was going to say sorry, so I gave up a bit but when he looked up at me his eyes were hard.

"She is a tyrant, she will fall with the rest of the Templers."

I grinned a angry sick grin.

"Even me?"

I had been training with the Templers for sometime now, I kept it from Anders.

"What?"

He was in shock I could see it on his face plan as day; I smiled at him standing up.

"That's right Anders, I have learned Templar abilities. Fenris pointed out I need a defense if you turned on me. I had to agree."

He stood as well his eyes were glaring at me.

"How could you do this Hawke? How could you become what I hate more than anything in the world."

How could he point the finger at me, he was the one so dead set on being a weapon for mages.

Their 'freedom' was going to drive him away from me, I had already told myself I would never let him leave.

I had lost my father, my brother, and my mother.

Anders was all I had left; Bethany was on the mage bandwagon their idea's seeping into her mind.

I was in could control of who and what Anders had contact with.

"How could I? It is simple Ander's I won't wait around for you to become a harm to yourself! I am taking causation."

I crossed my arms and leaned on my hip, he needs to understand. I just can't live without him.

"If I am so dangerous why don't I leave then!"

He yelled at me making everyone in the clinic watch us, I looked side to side, trying to seem casual he did the same.

After a moment I could see the conflict on his face.

I moved his face to look at me with my hand on his chin.

He looked at me sadly, he wanted what I wanted, he wanted he to understand his goals just as I wanted him to understand my goal to stop him before he was at the bottom of the gallows.

"You can never leave me."

I told him, dead on, I was not going to beat around the bush.

"I love you, Anders."

I hugged him, I was not one for public displays of affection but he needed to know I only wanted what was best for him.

"Why do you hate us so?"

He asked petting the top of my head as he held me in the middle of his clinic.

"Everything they touch dies, Father wanted to help a mage so he died, the mages made the blight and killed Carver, magic killed mother, and now has driven Bethany from me. And if not to kick me when I am down, I am in love with the one man in all of Thedas who is possessed with a sprit that make him think he is more than he is."

By the end of my little rant I felt my words becoming sloppy, and muffled.

My faced ended up at the base of his neck, breathing in his inviting smell of eathroot and burning firewood.

"My love, my people are the chosen people, we are given a gift that we wish to use to help, but the world wishes nothing from us. Our most noble of Internets are not good for anyone."

He kissed the top of my head before breathing in my smell, that he had told me was of armor polish, and fresh blooms. Which made sense my soap had flower petals in it and I had to keep my armor shiny for the nobles.

"Maybe if you tried seeing our side, you would be able to come to peace with what has happen and Bethany will return to you."

"How do you forgive the salt that is being pushed into your wounds day after day? The Templers make my mind at ease knowing Bethany is safe, not only from the outside world but from herself, I just wanted to give you a piece of that. "

I looked at him, I could my eyes were showing far to much emotion that I had wanted them too.

His eyes went from loving to harsh, his hands moved form my body, making me morn the lose.

"I had your so called 'safety' before."

He gave me a look that seemed to be challenging me, which he should know I never backed down from a challenge.

"And I will die before I go back to it."

His words had venom in them and his eyes burned with hate.

Grinding my teeth I turned and left.

I would keep Anders safe even if that meant hurting him.


End file.
